Hogan, Hagen, and Proben

I play golf every Wednesday morning in a two man “senior” scramble at the The Grande in Jackson.  You must be at least sixty years old to participate. I started playing right after I retired.  I’ve had two partners for the past baker’s dozen years.  Early on my partner and I placed “in the money” two or three times each year.  As the years passed those days are few and far between.  I still like to play.  It’s a good way to get outdoors, and having people you like join you makes it even more enjoyable.

I have a regular foursome, but two of the regulars opted out last Wednesday.  My playing partner, Craig, and I were paired with two strangers.  I forget one of the guy’s name, but I’ll never forget the other.   He enthusiastically introduced himself as Thomas Proben. “There was Hogan, Hagen, and now there’s Proben.  I’m Proben.”  Indeed he was.

As he introduced himself, he shared his golf prowess.  He flashed his ring and explained, “I’m the 2010 Senior Long Drive Champion.  You should have seen the big guys I competed against.  When they took the picture of the top three, the top of my head was level with their shoulders.”  He walked to the tee, hit his drive, turned back to us and said, ” I’m sixty-eight. When I play in the Rocket Mortgage, you guys are invited to be my guest.  I’ll take you out to dinner. It’ll be great!” This all happened in our first five minutes together.  I knew right then that we were in for a round like no other.

As you can see, he’s a flashy dresser.  That’s the first thing you notice. The dress shirt, tie, vest, fedora with a candy cane striped feather, and golf shoes tipped in brass, create a distinctive persona. The shafts of his clubs look like candy canes and he explained,  “I’ve had them made this way because of the candy maker story based upon the Bible.”  I looked it up.  There is such a story and it references the bible several times.  As our round progressed he offered up a half dozen scripture passages.

Thomas hit his drives and irons very well.  If he missed a shot, he hit it too long.  He never “laid up”.  He went for the pin and was always on line. His putting needs work.  I thought I could help him with that, but I didn’t offer.  He studied each putt, examined each blade of grass, and when he missed, he missed long.  Every shot he took was deliberate.  He pondered each stroke in great detail before hitting the ball.  He left nothing to chance.

This will not go down as my favorite round, but it’s one of the most memorable.  As we walked off the eighteen green, Proben shook our hands and said, “I’m having some towels made for the Rocket Mortgage. They’re gonna say,  There was Hogan, Hagen, and now there’s Proben.  I’ll make sure you guys get one.“

Proben, and his partner, beat Craig and me by seventeen strokes.  We stayed with them for the first six holes and then everything went south. We were only down two. I didn’t expect to hang with the pro, but I didn’t expect to be beaten by seventeen.  There’s always next week.  I’ve got my fingers crossed that our regular foursome will hit the links together.  As for Thomas Proben, I’m one and done.