Safety First

When my grandson, Brady, was old enough to comprehend simple conversations, we stressed the concept of “safety first”.  You know the drill, look both ways before crossing the street, always hold hands, watch the red, yellow, green lights, wear a life jacket near the water, don’t go with strangers, and on and on.  There are dozens a safety tips we pass on to our youngsters.

Brady was so conscious of our precautions, that he recited the “safety first” mantra as he implemented it.  During one of his trips to The Villages with his mom, Ruth, Lindsay, Brady and I went to one of the town squares for ice cream and dancing.   Brady and I were walking a few steps ahead of Ruth and Lindsay, and as we prepared to cross the street, he grabbed my right hand with is left and the hand of a random grandmother with his right.  Her seven-year-old granddaughter held her other hand.  The four of us crossed in unison.

He didn’t let loose until we got to the dance floor.  I watched as he danced with the young lady, four years his senior.  Her grandmother and I just smiled.  He proved then and there that apples don’t fall far from the tree.

Living alone has many challenges.  Beyond the obvious having to do everything by yourself, there’s the what if stuff.  What if I fall, what if I get sick, what if I have to have someone drive me for a medical procedure, what if I never get up.  Who’ll find me, and how long will it take.  I know it’s not something we look forward to, but I own it now.

I have a friend of over forty-five years who spends his winters in The Villages like me.  He’s been single for about forty of the years. He has a special friend whom he speaks to every evening.  They check up on the day’s events and each other.

A couple of years ago I offered to join his list of emergency contacts and keep a key for him just in case.  He told me he had a neighbor with a key and a notification system in place.  If he didn’t speak to his friend, she was to call his neighbor, and the neighbor would use the key to check on him.  He’s had that system for the past seven years.

He passed the key on to me last week and asked that I become his “go to” guy.  Circumstances had changed with his neighbors, and he needed someone he could count on.  That’s me now.  As I took the key we talked about other people in similar circumstances.  Since Ruth’s passed, I’m one.  I’d venture to say there are literally thousands of Village residents living alone.  I wonder what they do.  I’m very certain that many, if not most, have little support and we all need it.  If I were a younger man, I’d set up a business.  But I’m not, so I won’t.

I’m not ready to buy into one of the medical alert systems available.  I bought one for my mom when she stopped going out on her own.  I thought “safety first” was a good idea.  I don’t think she ever used it.  Most of the time the medical necklace just hung on the bed, and more than once she’d point at it and ask me what it was for.   The only time the system was implemented was when I conducted a monthly test.  You can have all the safety precautions in the world, and if you aren’t able to implement them, they’re useless.

As for me, I have friends with keys and the passcode to my garage.  People can get in if there’s a need.  It’s knowing when that’s the challenge.  I need to develop a system that’ll work here in Florida and a separate system when I return to Michigan.  After all, safety first is a lifelong motto we should all live by, and we all need a system that works for us.