Sometimes

When I met Ruth, she was as liberal as any of the women I knew.  Although I don’t think she ever burned her bra like others from our youth, she supported those who did.

When we started teaching, women had to wear skirts or dresses.  There were no pants allowed.  During our third or fourth year, she approached our building principal and asked that the ban on pants be lifted.  After careful consideration, he decided pant suits could be worn, but they must be coordinated outfits.  Her actions put a crack in a door that eventually flew wide open.

Over our years together she drifted further and further to the right, becoming more conservative.  Her conservative views weren’t embraced by many of her friends.  She learned to stop sharing as she was verbally attacked by some.  She learned that silence helped keep the peace.  She wasn’t happy being quiet, but like many, she kept most of her views regarding politics and religion to herself.

I wondered, privately, if those who ridiculed her for her views were really her friends.  We discussed the tabu topics privately but seldom publicly.  We agreed on most controversial topics but not all.  On some, we’d agreed to disagree.

One thing we very definitely agreed upon was how during our time together the media went from simply reporting the news like Walter Cronkite, to telling us what we should believe like the vast majority of news people today.  I ran across this piece written by Ruth. She wrote it a couple of years ago but shared it with no one.  This is what she had to say.

Things are not always what they appear to be.  Two people can look at the same event and based upon personal life experiences and biases – formed by what they read, hear, or see – see the glass as half full or half empty.

Last week a rope in the shape of a loop was found in Bubba Wallace’s NASCAR garage.   It was immediately reported that someone had placed it there as a symbol of hatred for the driver and his race.  The media ran with it and fanned the flames of hatred that is playing out across this country today.  Fortunately, this attention caused some good things to happen.

The men and women of the NASCAR community rallied behind Bubba and supported him in a show of unity for what was thought to be a racially motivated hate crime.

Meanwhile, the FBI was called in and quickly investigated this alleged crime.  They determined that it was a looped rope used to hold open a garage door, and it had probably been there since the garage was put into use earlier in the year.

Things are not always what they seem.  Sometimes a looped rope is just a looped rope placed into service to adjust the malfunction of a poorly operating door.  But perspective is everything when it comes to decision making.  And so, as I continue to react to the events around me, I need to remind myself to question my personal prejudices as I judge any person or situation.  I will question what I put into my head, especially information provided by the media.

I hope everyone reading this will do the same.

I’m sharing this via my blog, so our grandchildren know a bit more about Nana and what made her tick.  She helped alter the dress code for female teachers in the early 70’s.  She was a trail blazer for women on the west side of the state.

And her words are a great reminder that we all need to be critical thinkers capable of forming our own opinions, because sometimes a loop is just a loop.