In Retrospect

My youngest sister, Jackie, gave me a gift last year.  I don’t recall if it was Christmas, or not, but she did nonetheless, and I set it aside.  It was a box of questions that you could use to start a discussion.  I think they’re intended to be a game because there’s a reference to earning points.  The game encourages you to “put down your phone” and have a meaningful conversation.

I was cleaning up my desk the other day and found it.  When I received it, I wasn’t feeling like playing a game.  I’m more inclined to do so now.  I’m not any happier than I was a year ago, but I’m in a better place.

I opened the box today and examined a few questions.  The first three read:

1. What day or moment would you like to relive?
2. What personal achievement are you most proud of?
3. What did you want to achieve this year but didn’t?

All three require some thought, and that’s really the point isn’t it.  Think and be willing to share your thoughts.

Rather than write a response to any one of these, I’ve decided to write about three goals I set after Ruth passed.

Two days after Ruth’s accident, I called David, Elizabeth and Michael into a room to speak privately.  I did so more than once during those first few days.  I made a series of decisions and wanted to bounce them off my three kids.  In no particular order of importance, I wanted to do three things.

Set up a family scholarship fund.  Ruth and I had discussed it, made several decisions, but didn’t take that first step.

Plan a memorial for Ruth.  I wanted it to be personal.  And I wanted each member of our immediate family to be involved.

I wanted to publish a book of my blogs.  The proceeds, if ever there are any, would be used to help fund the family scholarship.

I was able to do all three this year.  That’s a good thing.  We set up the fund and gave three students a leg up on their career goals.

We held two memorials for Ruth, one in Florida and one in Michigan.  Florida’s taught us a few things and Michigan’s was just about perfect. They were truly a celebration.  I believe there will be another one, but hopefully, not too soon as I’ll be attending in spirit only.

And finally, I published my book.  It went on sale a month ago.  If you’re one of the dozen people who’ve purchased it, thanks for your kind words.  If you’ve been waiting to purchase so you could pay electronically, and get an autographed copy, I take PayPal and Venmo.  I’ve jumped forward into the electronic banking age, proving you can teach an old dog a new trick.

As for the game my sister bought me, I plan to go through all of the cards to read the questions.  I don’t spend too much time on social media, but perhaps more than I should.  I’m short on person-to-person discussions.  Living alone curtails that option.  I need to get out and about more.  The cards may provide me with some ice breaking ideas.

I’ve been introduced to over four-hundred and thirty single women through the social media site I signed up for three months ago.  I’ve exchanged messages with a couple but nothing more.  Perhaps I’m too picky.  I’m scheduled to have coffee with one tomorrow.  That’ll be a giant leap for this man.  If all goes well, I may write more about the experience.  If not, I’ll keep it to myself.